Just Do It

To own or to have something is important.

To do things is more important.

I have owned plenty over the years. Brand new, big houses. Brand new, big cars. Brand new clothing. Brand new things. You know what though? They are all gone for the most part. Sold. Moved. Moved on. Not at all sad about that. Don't get me wrong, I did enjoy those things but at the end of the day, the things are fleeting moments in time. Temporary placeholders for the experiences and the people in my life. The hard cover that houses the pages of your favorite book. The music apparatus where your favorite song lives. The screen where you saw that one movie you always go back to. It's not what this is about.

Over the last several years, I have downsized into a much smaller house. A much smaller car. Stopped going out and buying things and started going out and doing things.

I have traveled to places I have never imagined going to. I have seen things I never could have dreamt of. I have experienced things I will never forget.

Downsized so I can experience life's upside.

To do really is to be. Just do it!

PS; The picture is my wife and I hanging out at the waterfalls of Iceland.

Good Grief

Everyone remembers good ol' Charlie Brown right? The lovable loser who loved his dog and his friends unconditionally. When things went bad for CB (and that was often), he would exclaim the words "good grief" in frustration (ARRRRGH was also a popular one from Chuck back in the day as well but that's for another blog).

Last year, I lost my sister. She was one of my best friends. I have been grieving ever since. It's coming up on the one year anniversary and my mom reached out to see what I wanted to do for it. I thought about it and came to the conclusion that I wanted to have fun on that day with people I love. I wanted to laugh. I wanted to hear song. I want to live even more on that day alone. My mom on the other hand wants a quiet day of reflection.

See, the two of us have been grieving for almost a year and we couldn't have been more polarizing on our means of dealing with the loss. Neither is right or wrong. It just is.

Good grief is different for us all. What's good for me or you, may not be good for another. The key is to grieve in your own way. It's a part of the process and a key step towards healing and closure.

It's taking me a long time to realize I can't change my mom or anyone else for that matter in this regard. I can listen. I can appreciate. I can be there. But, I can't take away the pain by imposing my vision of grieving.

Good grief? It's all relative.

Thanks Chuck!

(And, this little piece of unsolicited advice didn't even cost you the 5 cents Lucy charges)