Sunday, July 29, 2012
The blueprint has been laid out for you. You shouldn't improvise. You shouldn't stray from the design. This goes there for a reason. This corner was designed this way because it just has to be at that angle.
Trust these people...they have been there before. The conception...composition...and constitution are all predetermined based on the specs that have been laid out by others who know better.
Are you sure?
The same holds true for our past. The blue print is laid out. By family, by friends, by influencers, etc. Most of the heavy lifting is done by family though. They have laid out the blueprint for us. A lot of us feel we have no choice but to follow their lead. Follow their design. What if their design is faulty? What if they were wrong?
Look, the bottom line is that you have a choice. Yes, there is the basic blueprint. Yes, there may be some predispositions. But...you have the power to crumple of the blueprints, toss them in the garbage can and start over. You own your own eraser. It's never too late.
Go ahead...create your own reality.
Throw away the protractor. Direct your future...don't settle for following directions. Who knows what you can create.
Monday, July 23, 2012
Whether it be husband/wife, boss/employee, coach/player, etc.
You need both to make the relationship work...but the key is how much of one do you have compared to the other.
One is logical, objective and structural in nature. The titles you hold in this relationship, define your role.
The titles define the rules.
You feel obligation, responsibility and a commitment to the long term vision.
The other is emotional, subjective and relational in nature. Regardless of the titles you hold in the relationship, your feelings for the other person define your role.
The titles defy the rules.
You feel passion, spontaneity and a commitment to the short term vision.
Again...both are needed.
And when you are dealing with the human element of relationships...just a little bit one way or another can make a huge difference.
If you are too much on either side...the teeter totter tips.
Look, you can get to 100 several different ways but if one is 50 and the other is 50...your math will equal far greater than 100.
That's the mathematics of the human element at work.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Recently...during a night of insomnia...while flipping through the channels...I bumped into Kevin Arnold again. It was good to see him.
I had forgotten how good "The Wonder Years" was. It was a brilliant portrayal of youth and retrospect with age through the acting of Fred Savage and the narration of Daniel Stern.
It made me think of lots of things...
We are so vulnerable...yet so willing to take risks during our youth.
We are at our creative peak during our youth because everything is possible.
We are innocent during our youth.
We love with all of our heart.
All our young lives we search for someone to love, someone who makes us complete. We choose partners and change partners. We dance to a song of heartbreak and hope all the while wondering if somewhere and somehow there is someone searching for us.
We invest so much into what we are working on because it means so much to us at the time.
The problem is we lose so much of the gift that was given to us while we were young.
I'm young. I live in a house my father owns, in a bed my father bought..Nothing is mine..except my heart and my fears and my growing knowledge that not every road is gonna lead home anymore.
We become cynical.
We no longer think of the impossible.
We get tired.
We don't do childlike things because we aren't supposed to.
We don't play.
We let others decide who and what we need to be rather than being real with who we are.
We don't believe anymore. It's like in the movie "Polar Express"...we don't hear the wonderful jingle of the bell.
When we are young, we are always looking forward with great anticipation. As we age, we start to look backward with great regret.
As you age...
Keep being silly
Keep dancing and singing even when others don't hear the music
Keep thinking the impossible is possible.
Keep the light burning
If you do...the mid-life crisis becomes the mid-life celebration.
They say hindsight is 20/20, and I guess that's true; because standing there that night everything became so clear.
Kevin Arnold knew what is he was talking about.
We all did.